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the single most difficult thing

June 11, 2012

do you know the hardest part of being a single girl?  it’s not getting frocked in fancy cocktail dresses that clasp with hidden hooks and buttons that require olympic gymnast-level flexibility.  it’s not mastering meals that yield only enough for one mouth.  and it’s not even feeling bad about eating cookies in bed and watching say yes to the dress.  because that i don’t feel bad about.

no, sir, the hardest part of being a single girl is putting your bed back together after washing your sheets.

the battle rages on

the flat sheet, the fitted sheet and the pillow cases are fine and dandy.  but it’s the duvet and its cover that require every drop of strength, every bit of determination and every ounce of guile in my little single girl body to get that silly feather-filled sandwich inside its flimsy, fickle robe.  it breaks me down- until i’m sweating and cursing and have given myself a headache.  i debate pouring myself a cocktail before i even make my first run at the bedding beast.  instead i grab a powerade.  this chore doesn’t require liquid courage- it requires liquid power.

as i emerge from my newly covered duvet, my muscles surge with strength.  my ego swells with pride.  and my face breaks out into a smile.  i have conquered the hardest of all single girl tasks.  just in time to crawl into bed with some cookies and milk and the second season of modern family.

being a single girl can be hard work.  but knowing you can survive in this world, with nothing more than the brain inside your head and the determination in your bones, is sweet.

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