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sunny side up

May 31, 2012

by the time you’re 27-years-old, like i am, you know a few things about yourself.  i burn in the sun.  my hands get all fidgety if i don’t bake something at least once a week.  i make messes.  and i need everyone to like me.

i cannot stand the thought of people being angry with me.  i get anxious when i fear someone’s mad at me.  i worry round the clock when i upset someone.  and if someone wishes me dead, i only wish sunshine and rainbows for them.  it’s a problem.  and i’m working on it.

by emailing my two most recent ex-boyfriends.

i have to be honest.  i did that.  i emailed ex-beau joe and ex-guy bri because i’ve been haunted for the past few weeks by the idea that we may not have left things on such great terms.  and by that, i mean that the last conversation i had with brian ended with me telling him, and i quote, “maybe we shouldn’t talk EVER.”  good one, jenny.  my childishness, my foolishness, my immaturity has been haunting me day and night like acid reflux after chinese takeout.

so i decided that emails would soothe my soul.  they did.  kind of.  i know in my heart that i’ve taken the high road.  i know that i have accepted blame for my part.  i know that i did nothing wrong (but i’ll apologize anyway…that whole sunshine and rainbows thing).  but i know that we will probably never be friends.

i know myself.  i love historical fiction.  i can’t stand the idea of unfiltered tap water.  not getting a daily run makes me crazy.  and i can’t be friends with everyone…no matter how hard i try.  but at least i’ve got sunshine and rainbows.

rainbow bright never had to deal with ex-boyfriends

 

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One Comment leave one →
  1. Notorious permalink
    May 31, 2012 3:55 pm

    You are too hard on yourself. Whatever the history, it is the ex’s fault…100%. That is why they are an ex. Remember, the best part of having an ex or even anyone who didn’t ttreat you properly is revenge! They missed the boat and you have your whole life to show them how they screwed up. As you know, Notorious got dumped on Valentines Day (not that I remember these things long) and Notorious loves the ABC show Revenge. Are the two related? maybe…maybe not. Rock on –Notorious

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