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universal struggle

January 5, 2012

the universe sure has a cruel sense of humor because just as soon as i’d clicked submit on that calorie whopper of a post below, my dad called.  this is not the humorous part.  but the question he posed is.  you see it’s girl scout cookie time in the southern united states.  so dad, being the loving, adoring, father that he is called to ask my favorite kind of the girlie goodies.  but before i excitedly exclaimed “umm, all of them!” i thought long and hard.  well, actually i didn’t have to think all that long nor all that hard.  because my favorite of all the girl scout cookies is clearly the tagalong (a.k.a. peanut butter patty).  so here i am, on my high horse, posting about obesity and health and calories.  that makes the universe laugh, thereby triggering dad’s phone to dial mine and ask whether i’d like a peppermint or peanut butter induced heart attack.

giggle on, universe.

because after i hung up with dad i trotted on down to the local drugstore to pick up a prescription.  being the closeted fat kid that i am, i chose to take the path to the pick-up window that included a stroll down the candy aisle.  well wouldn’t you know, m&m’s are on sale.  buy one, get one!  when does that ever happen?  today apparently.  and all because i thought i was stronger than the pull of a candy-coated chocolate.  all because i thought that i was in control of what i put in my mouth.  all because i made the universe laugh.

that’s a real gut buster, huh?  the universe keeps laughing and laughing.  as i haul my goodies the three blocks to my apartment.  (i even paid the $.05 extra for a plastic bag, thinking that if i could hide my purchases in a flimsy sheath of plastic, maybe no one would know)

so i sit here.  eating my oatmeal and yogurt for lunch.  i did three miles on the treadmill this morning and a girl from pilates even told me how talented i am.  i walked to the store during lunch.  and i promise i’ll take the stairs at least once today.  i realize i’m not entirely in control, especially not when it comes to that fickle creature called the universe.  he may laugh when i fail the tests he sends my way.

but i’ve got a pantry full of m&m’s.  so i ask you, mr. universe, who’s laughing now?


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